My boyfriend has what I guess could be described as a foot fetish? I'm a straight female in my early twenties and I've been with my boyfriend for a little over 6 months. Everything is great except for this one thing I'm having an issue with. I work a job where I'm on my feet most of the day and my boyfriend would give me regular foot massages to alleviate some of the tension. I loved this part of our relationship until recently when he admitted to me that he has a foot fetish. That meant he wasn't giving me these massages for me but rather because it turned him on. I just can't get over the fact that he lied to me for so long while he was doing this. Now I don't want him to even touch my feet at all. How do we move on from this?
Me and my boyfriend are in our early twenties and have a bit of an unusual problem. He lasts too long… It always takes over an hour of sex for him to cum and the same thing with blowjobs. He gets tired and I get sore and to be honest, after about half an hour I'm losing interest. It also occasionally makes me feel like I’m doing something wrong like I'm not being sexy enough. He does stay hard most of the time though, so it doesn’t seem like he’s not aroused. We can’t continue this way because it is affecting how often we have sex now because we know it’s going to take ages, and I can’t have sex for that long every day. What can we do? We have already tried having him not masturbate for a few days before hand and also watching porn during sex to see if that speeds things up, but neither has worked at all. I've had the issue of men finishing too quickly before and I never knew the opposite could be a problem too.
We feel your pain girl. There’s a lot of focus on men trying to last longer. But get boned for an hour a day for a week and you will be praying for a little premature ejaculation. When people want a long sex session that’s usually because they want more room for teasing and foreplay and other fun stuff. Not because they want to get pounded non-stop all day. That’s very repetitive and quite traumatic for the orifice.
Sex is also best with some variety. You want to have marathons, half marathons, sprints and relaxing strolls on the menu. A marathon every day might kill you.
Is your boyfriend on any medications that could be impacting his ejaculation? Is he a drinker, smoker, stoner or regular user of any other drugs? Many prescribed and recreational drugs can prolong the time it takes to orgasm. So I’d rule this out first.
But if there are no substances that might be responsible, the next thing to look at is his wanking habits. Does it take him 1+ hour to jack off? Or has that remained a quick process? If he’s able to masturbate to completion quickly then that tells us a couple of things. Firstly, it means he’s able to cum quick, meaning his long lasting in sex is likely either a psychological issue or a masturbatory technique issue. Secondly, it means we have a solution.
On a psychological level, it may be that consciously or unconsciously he’s prolonging time to orgasm with a partner. On a technical level, it may be that he is used to masturbating in a way that is not replicable by partnered sex. For example, he could be gripping his dick extremely hard when wanking, and after years of this habituated it to this sensation. Your vagina, of course, cannot mimic a clenched fist even if you kegel like a pro, and so his penis isn’t getting the intense grip that it is used to. This issue can be rectified by him abstaining from masturbation for longer than a few days, and then returning to it with a looser grip. Taking an extended break from wanking may also help if it is a psychological effect.
But most of all, if he can rub himself to completion in a few minutes, this is the solution to your problem. You don’t have to wait for your boyfriend to orgasm while he’s still inside you. He can pull out and finish himself off at any point. It still counts as sex. You don’t have to leave the room, you are still a part of it. Meanwhile, you can kiss him (or his balls) and experiment with finding different places for him to ejaculate.
I hope one of these solutions works for you, and am sure one will. But if not, get back in touch and I can offer another approach. Good luck and give your poor vagina a hug from me.
My boyfriend and I have been together just under a year and I'd say we are very close and loved up. The relationship is going really well and most of the time I’m very happy and secure in it. My problem is that on a couple of occasions he's said another girls name during sex. A girl that he used to see right before we got together… It really upsets me and puts doubts in my mind about whether he really wants to be with me. He says it doesn't mean anything but I'm not sure if that’s possible? Can you help?My boyfriend and I have been together just under a year and I'd say we are very close and loved up. The relationship is going really well and most of the time I’m very happy and secure in it. My problem is that on a couple of occasions he's said another girls name during sex. A girl that he used to see right before we got together… It really upsets me and puts doubts in my mind about whether he really wants to be with me. He says it doesn't mean anything but I'm not sure if that’s possible? Can you help?
"I’m a little bit sceptical because I’ve never heard of a woman who doesn’t like oral sex."
My boyfriend pulls unattractive faces during sex. Normally, he's gorgeous - strong looking and cool. But once we get going, he gets all sweet and soppy and makes this funny grin and I find it a real turn off. I've tried keeping my eyes shut during sex, but he's started noticing. Nearly everything else about him is great. I can't see it getting better though, and I don't know what to do. Any ideas?
"I love anal sex. The problem is my girlfriend doesn't seem to like it so much and has said an outright no to the idea (although she doesn't mind an odd finger). "
"Hey. I’ve been in a great relationship for a couple of years now. Everything is really good with my boyfriend and it’s just all round a really strong and happy relationship. My one thing is just that he is very gentle and maybe a bit restrained in sex. I’ve always liked quite rough sex, like not full on 50 shades but maybe a dominant slightly aggressive partner a little hair pulling and smacking around. My current bf doesn’t even like to slap my arse too hard incase he hurts me... The sex is physically fulfilling in the sense that he feels good, he spends a long time on foreplay and I do orgasm. But I just feel frustrated like can he just forget he loves me for a few mins and just be a little rougher and not so sweet and gentle. What can I do to get him to do this? Or can I not? "